"Ted Haggard Is Completely Heterosexual" by Roy Zimmerman

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My songs are available through my website and on iTunes. Here, I perform "Ted Haggard..." at the 142 Throckmorton Theatre in Mill Valley during a recent "Mark Pitta and Friends" comedy night.

Channel: Comedy
Uploaded: April 7, 2007 at 1:25 am
Author: RoyZimmerman

Length: 00:03:36
Rating: 4.86
Views: 155067

Tags: Ted Haggard songs satirical gay evangeleical hypocrisy pride

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pride _Ted_Haggard_Is_Completely_Heterosexual__by_Roy_Zimmerman Comments:
helpsYouUp (November 17, 2008 at 8:52 pm)
Hey what a song! How about these lyrics:

I go to the gas station-to pump some gas
I stick it in the exhaust pipe-like you do your a**-People begin to wonder-how can I be so dumb-but this analogy I am showing-is just good old fasion fun-Who cares if it is unhealthy-because I have my rights-to display my stupidity-and senseless logic to new heights-This song that I wrote-is done in a certian way-to remind your time is comming which is your judgement day.
theonlynever6 (November 17, 2008 at 7:09 pm)
check some Leviticus chapters. Specifically 18. The part about killing homosexuals for being gay is either in chapter 18 or 19 (I can't recall offhand).
callif (November 17, 2008 at 12:34 pm)
Actually I don't think he gets paid for that... I'm pretty sure he has to pay to do that.
:)
ikie12pts (November 14, 2008 at 3:44 pm)
Fabian, what did Jesus say about homosexuals? Book..chapter...and verse?
ikie12pts (November 14, 2008 at 3:39 pm)
It's a play on words....Hello????
PaladinRS (November 13, 2008 at 10:32 pm)
It says in his Wikipedia listing that he was the bottom.
He was almost definitely a pillow biter. (no offense. I have been using that for ages and am a huge redneck. Though I try to overcome it)
sumfamousperson17 (November 13, 2008 at 3:23 pm)
That was awesome xD
jesusnthedaisychain (November 12, 2008 at 7:48 pm)
The best part is that now Ted is claiming that he was sexually abused as a child, thus leading him into the depraved meth-fueled world of gay sex.

Another excuse.
ikie12pts (November 12, 2008 at 7:30 pm)
He isn't ridiculing hypocrits...just TED HAGGARD....I knew when I first saw Pastor Ted that he was gay. Most woman can tell immediately. And now he says his marriage is stronger...he's a stronger Christian. His wife has to have the IQ of a turnip.
jesterspace (November 14, 2008 at 3:38 am)
Well, duh.. she married him, after all.. :)